Today I have come to realize that couples are no
longer getting together for the purpose of real love and partnership. They are mostly getting together for the
purpose of convenience. Love seems to be
the thing of the past and yet everyone is angry over why their relationships
end up the way it does. Communication no
longer exists. Instead after a long day
of work they watch TV and go to bed and start the day over again. Kind and
loving words have become a novelty.
Arguments and bitterness predominant.
The question is: did this ideal relationship that I am contemplating
ever exist? Were couples at one time revolved around love?
Around my search for answers I was reminded of the
story of Loki. For those who don’t know
what that is: Loki is a shapeshifter and gender shifter, a helper, but also the
consummate trouble maker. Loki, the god of fire and chaos in the heathen faith,
was a handsome, mischievous and charismatic giant.
Loki's acts
of clever trickery began as soon as he was created. Loki represents free time,
both the necessity for it and what happens if a clever mind is left to its own
devices for too long. For instance, Loki is a god who's greatly fond of
practical jokes. The harmless ones didn't make it into the mythology, but the
not-so-harmless ones leave a long trail of tears, hurt feelings and one can
only assume severe beatings.
Through many
stories and happenings, Loki's downward spiral from mischievous and
untrustworthy had finally earned him a place of genuine and irredeemable
wickedness. For his crimes he was held beneath the earth, bound by the entrails
of his two non-monstrous sons and a serpent was set over him to drip venom into
Loki's eyes. His wife would catch the poison, but when she had to empty the
bowl Loki would thrash in agony, causing earthquakes.
Loki is
something unique, even in pagan faiths. Typically the role of the trickster is
to challenge order with chaos, and to overcome through wits and cunning. Always
needing to outdo the last con, or insisting that the next time will be
different, he grew bitter and envious of the praise and love given to others
but not to him. As such he became the greatest enemy to one he once counted as
friend.
What is
interesting about Loki and the role his wife plays is the symbology we see in
our everyday relationships. As we have
forgotten about “love” being the pivotal point in our relationships, we have
become shape-shifters and tricksters. We
have become the one that constantly demands for his/her wishes to be fulfilled
and if somehow this does not happen, then the earthquake. We cause earthquakes in relationships to
demand attention. We are asking our partners
to constantly to hold the cup to gather the venom which we were the creator of
to begin with. When the cup is not held,
we cause chaos.
Every one of
us to one degree or the other does this and some more than others. If you truly look at your life as a viewer
and without judgement, you will see that you have also done that from time to
time. When the things don’t go your way,
you decide to blame, throw temper tantrums and if the cup-holder does not
assume their regular position, even cause chaos and earthquake to have back the
security of someone holding that cup for you.
Recently
read a book from Dr. Bruce Lipton called: “The Honeymoon Effect”. This book is a must read for those who truly
have decided to change and make relationships work. If you are not ready to change, don’t waste
the money buying it. One part in this book really stood out for me in which Dr.
Lipton talked about the basic chemistry and “noble gasses”. I will try to somehow summarize what had been
said ever so beautifully and explained in detail. In this book Dr. Lipton talks about the basic
periodic table and the 118 elements within it.
Six of these elements are called “noble gasses” which create no chemical
bonds. The other 112 elements form
chemical bonds with one another to create the molecules that create or make up
everything around us. Just to bring a
quick understanding to this, it is good to be reminded of what we learned in
high school.
We have
learned about atoms and the fact that within their structure we have protons
that have positive charge and electron with equal negative charge. There is the same number of protons and
electrons in each atom. Protons are
massed together in the nucleus and the electrons orbit around the nucleus. Each orbit can only contain a certain number
of electrons – 2,8,18,32, and 50. With
the exception of the first orbit or shell, the other orbits are made of
sub-orbits or sub-shells. When an orbit
is filled with the maximum number of electrons, additional ones then jump to
the outer orbit and if that is filled to the outer one yet and this continues.
When an orbit is not at its maximum number of electrons, like a badly loaded
washing machine, the atom starts to wobble as it is spinning.
So going
back to where we started, 112 of the elements on the periodic table are
wobbly. In this they want to balance
their wobble through bonding with another atom that has a complementary
wobble. When they bond, they spin in
harmony. Now, the 6 noble gasses are unique, because they are the only elements
that are complete and do not wobble; so they do not normally seek to bond with
another element, so they are chemically inactive.
Going back
to the other 112 elements, we see that the chemical bonding within them creates
“co-dependent” relationships. Each atom
is “depending” on the need of the other atom to create peace and harmony and
balance. The key word in here is: Need.
So these elements fulfill the Universe’s tendency to find balance by
combining. Even though by this chemical
bond, both atoms are now in harmony, this relationship is based on fulfilling
each other’s needs.
In our
relationships, we have the tendency of doing exactly what atoms do. We go after
“out of balance” partners to balance.
When the two partners complement each other’s imbalance, together they
live in harmony with no wobbles. This
kind of relationships cause a battle between conscious and subconscious
minds. Even though the partner maybe
abusive, you will find yourself begging them to stay. You don’t want to let
them go because of the imbalance in yourself.
Once we
align our conscious and subconscious minds, we become noble gasses, spinning in
perfect balance. Wobbly atoms behave
wobbly around us, but we do not get sucked into being like them. We would love
them, but not get attached to them. Now,
one of the characteristics of noble gasses is to create excimers. An excimer is a special bonding between two
atoms that would not normally bond. Dr.
Lipton goes to give an amazing example of this kind of bonding: when a noble gas
atom is hit by a photon of light, its normal state is altered. It absorbs photon’s energy and starts to
vibrate faster. In this state of
excitement it will seek bonding with another noble gas, so to share that
excitement. This is a relationship without
co-dependency. This produces a
relationship filled with unconditional love along with caring and sharing. And
this is the “happily ever after”.
I would like
to mention a few guidelines in creating a long-lasting honeymoon relationship
that we all so crave.
·
Align your conscious and subconscious minds;
·
Enter a relationship only and only based on love.
If there is true love for each other, ALL other will sort itself out. If the love is weak or secondary motive, the
relationship at one point will fall apart;
·
Communicate, communicate and communicate. Without this simple ingredient, we cannot
pursue any kind of a healthy and long lasting relationship;
·
Nothing and no one outside the two of you matter.
Focus on the love you have for one another;
·
Past is past.
Leave it there. Neither one of
you were aware of this day when you would be in each other’s lives, so not to
do what bothers you now about it. Start fresh, today, without any talks of the
past;
·
Repeat kind, loving words to each other throughout
the day. Reaffirm your love on a daily
and consistent basis, verbalize each other’s good qualities and why you are so
in love with one another;
·
Touch and show affection at all times, even during
arguments. Touching and physical contact
is of utmost importance.
Live in Light!
EL
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